“The moment you are impatient, you recognize the force of time, that places in your way, the obstacles of space, to start a new chain of causation.”
— A.K. 1990
Born at dawn on December 19, 1942, 8:02 AM, CWT on an army base in San Antonio, Texas. Fiery, philosophical 27° Sagittarian Sun, exactly conjunct Galactic Center, just then rising to cross the 21° Sagittarian Ascendant.
Visionary, long-cycled planet Neptune, at 2° of diplomatic Libra, conjunct both the SuperGalactic Center and the personal Midheaven, aspecting all planets except Moon and Jupiter.
Most difficult aspect: Neptune/MC square (90°), in friction with, Venus &Mercury at 5°& 7° of practical, controlling Capricorn. Life Path: Peace-maker, with tendency to dominate. Life Lesson: to learn to lead by subtly invoking invisible frequency fields for human cooperation.
Meanwhile, earthy Moon (23° Taurus) and watery Jupiter (23° Cancer), closely aspected, ground and nourish otherwise overwhelming fiery energy, to vision, manifest, and dwell, as a sovereign soul, in several experimental communities.
Another strong drive is mental: Mars at 2° Sagittarius in 12th house opposite (in conflict with) revolutionary Uranus/Saturn conjunction 1°- 7° Gemini in 6th house: learning how to recognize and share unconscious cultural patterns while restlessly communicating unusual and innovative perceptions of the external world.
Here is a statement from my higher self that shot through my fiery personality, unbidden, several decades ago, diagnosing the root cause of my overall difficulty with this embodied life in 3D: “The moment you are impatient, you recognize the force of time, that places in your way the obstacles of space, and starts a new chain of causation.”
“Ann, explorer and witness to psychic, synchronistic, astrological and psychological links between inner psyche, outer reality and invisible realms, portrays a marriage that continued after death to encompass these realms and their differences. A remarkable narrative.”
— Jean Shinoda Bolen, M.D., Jungian analyst, well-known author and speaker.
This book invites the reader into the rich inner journey of a woman whose husband died of a heart attack and left her, bereft and alone, in a brand new town. Unlike many who suffer sudden, unimaginable loss, Kreilkamp, 60, did not fall into depression. She describes, in detail, her “year of conscious grieving” during which she formally attended to new widowhood as a precious and short-lived mine of information and inner expansion. Interweaving the many dimensions—visible and invisible, literal and spiritual—to which she was privy during the initial stages of her mourning process, she shares both poignant remembrances and the shocking transformations that moved her and moved through her like squalls.
This Vast Being plunges the reader into the dynamics of a difficult marriage that gradually evolved into a union of equals and opened both their hearts. And it reveals the complex inner reality of Jeffrey Joel, a mostly submerged Renaissance Man who, post-death, presented unusual phenomena to demonstrate his existence in a realm that she sensed only a hair-breath from ours; who continued to impart his wisdom after he died and, to her surprise and delight, who invited her into a deeper intimacy than he could afford while embodied.
This Vast Being invites the reader into certain interior spaces of which most of us are not normally aware, and to explore them. As we open to this vast being inside us, we access an expansive awareness that transforms what appears as irreplaceable loss into a magnificent cache of hidden significance. In so doing, this book creates a down-to-earth and unusually inclusive template for human healing.
Finally, This Vast Being gathers journal writings from the first year after my husband Jeff died into book chapters that hopefully, may assist, console, and even illuminate others who are undergoing the profound inner process that accompanies the death of a loved one.
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